Talking through problems will solve the other half. If either of us were feeling insecure we talked it through.Charles and I never argued, because nothing ever got to the point where it bred resentment. If, and I really mean when, you or your partner starts feeling attracted to someone else, creating a safe space to talk about it takes away much of the threat. The biggest threat to a relationship is you, not other people Happily partnered people don't leave for someone else.And my experiences on the periphery of non-monogamy taught me a lot about relationships, lessons I'm applying in my new, monogamous relationship. You will be attracted to people outside your relationship Having an open relationship has never been my goal, but I'm not going to bury my head in romantic sand.The truth is that staying monogamous is a challenge.A one-night stand might happen in the best of relationships, a brief excitement that is later regretted, usually because they got caught.But someone who's unhappy and resentful, bored or not getting their needs met will leave you one day regardless of whether your relationship is monogamous or polyamorous. Your partner is not enough In a poly relationship, other partners can be a source of happiness, self-esteem and satisfaction.Monogamists shouldn’t rely on their partner for all of these things all of the time either.Have friends, hobbies and places separate from your relationship and don’t expect one person to be lover, friend, parent, child carer, cheerleader and counselor. Your partner needs to know how important they are to you Even knowing Charles was juggling multiple partners, I never doubted how important I was to him, because he never left an information gap for me to fill in.
Every time someone chooses you, it affirms your relationship – even more so if they have a choice to be with someone else.He told me all the time how special I was; he'd message me to let me know how much he was looking forward to seeing me again.Lack of appreciation makes your partner needy and insecure, not sharing your time and attention with work, friends or family.'" The game had been played on both Smith and the man who thought he knew her.The man had been talking to who he thought was Chrissy Smith on the dating site Plenty of Fish, but Smith said she does not and never has had a profile on that site.The man showed her the Plenty of Fish profile with her name, her Facebook profile picture, and a month's worth of conversations.